What is Your Morning Routine?
A morning sprint and a brief defense of the commute
This morning, I landed on a 5 year old reddit page asking folks to report out on their morning routine -
I literally LOL’d at the “snorting some chia seeds for breakfast” bit because isn’t that the truth! The way some aspirational morning routines fall right off the tracks of reality. I think the following response is pretty in line with most of us -
Another cackle-worthy reply. Who among us has not been here, though?
***
My own routine is somewhere between the chia seeds and the crying, although I’ll say that the minute my kids wake up, everything immediately becomes more chaotic. The number of times I have to repeat “please get dressed” coupled with “please brush your teeth” can quickly sprint to losing the “please” and land in shrill. Motherhood ya know?
Let’s get into it.
***
5:00 AM | The alarm goes off. I usually snooze it a couple times, ideally getting up before 5:30. I am a woman who does what she says she will do, I sternly whisper to myself, every single GD day.
5:30ish AM | Roll out of bed, head downstairs to my preset coffee maker and pour a cup. This is my one and only life hack; preset the coffee maker so you have something to get out of bed for. One scoop of sugar + a generous pour of half and half. I have a geriatric dog that trots down the stairs a few minutes behind me. I let him out and wait for him at the door. Once he comes back in, we head upstairs. He promptly goes back to sleep at my feet.
5:40 AM | Look, I know this isn’t great, but I flip on my computer immediately. This is generally the only time of the day that I’ll be alone and frankly I enjoy this routine. I start by checking my personal email, play the daily Wordle and spend 45 minutes working on my Substack newsletter or a post here. I like to fantasize this will someday be part of my origin story.
6:30 AM | Shut my computer down and head to the bathroom to get ready for work. A crisp 10 minute shower followed by (in this precise order) brushing my wet hair, spritzing it with volumizing spray, and claw-clipping it back into a low bun. Then I put on my make-up - The Ordinary moisturizer mixed 50/50 with SunBum Glow 30, NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer, Rare Beauty contour + liquid blush, Laura Mercier setting powder, eye-liner and Tower28 mascara, and finally a quick mist of Urban Decay setting spray. Et voila!
6:50 AM | Head into the spare room that acts as my two-days-a-week WFH office and 24/7 closet and waffle over what to wear. I leave my deodorant in here so I can apply after putting on my bra and a mandatory base layer tank top, and after I go through a couple outfit variations, walk through a spritz of fragrance (currently Jo Malone Ginger Biscuit). Usually my littlest one, a natural early riser, has woken up and kept me company in my final stages of dress. This does often encourage me to wrap things up.
7:05ish | We go downstairs together and he has already been chattering at me since the minute his eyes have popped open and will continue to do so. I make a protein smoothie, pack some food for the office, am interrupted at least seven times to help open something, help find something, and “look at dis, mama!” I also pack my kiddo’s backpack with snacks and check the take-home folder for anything that needs my signature or attention.
7:30 AM | Wake up the rest of my family for work and school. The other dog usually hops out of bed and I follow him downstairs to let him out. Then I turn on the electric kettle for my husband’s coffee (he prefers a french press to my cheap Mr. Coffee pot). At this point, I’m directing kids to get dressed and brush their teeth, but as for me, I’m ready to go. Luckily because the sheer amount of times I need to remind these little dorks to put their socks on is very time consuming. Eventually (probably still shouting directives down the stairs as I go) I head upstairs to make my bed, chat with my husband while he’s in the shower, and just kind of putter around for a few unscheduled minutes.
7:55 AM | This should be 7:50 but I literally never walk out the door when I should. Actually if I’m more honest, 7:58 is probably most accurate. My husband does the school drop-off run, so I’m officially off duty at this point. I grab my stuff, do the goodbye hugs and kisses and hop in my car.
8:00-8:25 AM | Commuting and deeply enjoying the silence. Seriously. I use my drive into the office to come down from the morning chaos of trying to get kids ready for school, dogs shuffled in and out and fed, and myself ready for the day. It seems pretty streamlined when I wrote it out above, but really there’s a lot of noise, battling, bargaining, and barking. I usually try to take the first 10 minutes of my drive to just sit in silence and think about what needs to be done during the day, and then I’ll pop on the History Today podcast (literally 2 minutes and so interesting!) and then listen to the radio a bit. I feel pretty good by the time I pull into the parking lot at work.
8:30 AM | I’m at my desk, logged in, and drinking a cup of coffee. The day can begin!
Can we chat about aspirational morning routines? Sure I’d love to squeeze in a workout or time to journal, but my ultimate aspirational morning routine includes a sitcom breakfast. You know the kind, where everyone magically has the time to sit a the table (!!!) and eat together. There’s a full spread too - pancakes, eggs, some sausage links. A nice pile of toast. There’s always a big brother or a dad who can’t swing it and so he rolls through and grabs a waffle to shove in his mouth as he pulls one arm of his sweatshirt or suit jacket it on, respectively. Now that’s aspirational!
